The paradox of contradicting erotic and real life roles.

There is a paradox many who are associated with femdom fetish and masochism (mostly the humiliation, control, etc masochists, not the real pain masochists, which compose a specific category) ocassionaly mention. So, they often, surprised, conclude that masochists and femdom fetishists are very successful in real life and they are dominant in their real life. The solution to this supposedly paradox is simple. Their whole brain is simply functioning around terms like: worthy/unworthy, demand, dominant/submissive, above/below, so they watch real life this way and their erotic life too. For example, they work hard in order to feel worthy to be able to get satisfaction (for instance an expensive meal, etc). This ill perceived reality makes them active in real life, but in a compulsive way and not in a healthy creative way. But why, since these people are so dominant in real life, they choose to be submissive in their erotic life? Because, since they view life and pleasures as being worthy of them, etc, it is easy to feel below a hot woman (that has plastic eyelashes, fake boobs, etc, but they don't realise that). Also, they may excites them the fact they serve a mistress instead of fuck a hot model, since their servitude makes them feel worthy, since they get the attention of a "diva" and not a regular whore that anyone can have (the fact they suffer makes them feel they do something important, an ill-perceived reality of a child who reads textbooks to get good grades because he is forced to, without reason, and he ends to think that suffering is good). Also, they may perceive their desire for a hot woman as weakness and her charm as a power, because for them everything is about powers and weaknesses. Why these people don't want to be dominant in their erotic life, since they always seek dominance in real life? Because their chasing for dominance in real life is not a healthy attitude, but they seek dominance not because they enjoy it, but as a compulsion and as a way to alleviate their fear of insecurity and inferiority. That's why they choose to be submissive in their erotic life, in order to alleviate their fears. Isn't contradicting that they alleviate their fear they might be weak, etc by choosing to be weak in their erotic life? Well, no, because experiencing what they fear, they stop fearing it any more. Being submissive in their erotic life makes their mind place all their inner fears about weaknesses and inferiority to the erotic field, which is well controlled and well hidden (they actually have control over their mistress and their submissiveness is their little secret), otherwise they would live with their fears. Once again, it is shown that masochistic and femdom activities are a way to express a traumatic individual and these people must have the cure that they need and not to pay low life scums like dominatrixes. They often express their fetishes in a trustful relationship and this seems to work for them, but again, it is not wise science and society to close their eyes towards a mental health issue.